I’m a former professional baseball player with a few years of corporate business experience after I retired and just this past March I opened a coaching business, Pahooter Health & Wellness, operating in Denver, out of my house and a local coffee shop, Wash Perk.
I specifically work with struggling female business owners who are looking for a new way to make real, lasting changes in the totality of their lives.
I’ve spent this past year getting to know my neighbors, going to school, opening my business and helping as many people as I can, locally and all over the US, with their mentality.
As a Traveling Health Coach, what I do is intangible, and as a result, somewhat difficult to define- but the analogy that I have had the most success with recently is this:
At our birth, we are all given an incredible, amazing, wonderful gift. It’s a gift that some of us take for granted and it’s a gift that none of us will ever use to its full potential.
That gift is the most powerful computer on earth- the human brain.
And, as the most knowledgeable people will tell you, while we’ve learned a great deal about the brain and its processes, especially recently with the advent of such incredible technology, there is still a great deal left unknown. It’s a mystery that we are constantly trying to figure out and a mystery that we possibly may never solve.
This I will say– within our individual selves- the mystery of how much we can learn, how much we can grow, how far we can progress are all questions that we will never solve.
This awareness tends to spring forth a couple of different reactions- while some people may shut down- giving up with the realization that you can never max out, you can never be the best, and you can never actually know everything- Others- and I include myself in this group- will be fired up, Inspired and motivated. Excited to mature and transform, to become the absolute best version of themselves by relentlessly continuing to grow and learn.
As I spoke about this with a friend at Wash Perk just the other day, she echoed this sentiment back to me and described it as Intellectual Humility- and I really like that wording.
It’s allowing yourself to be vulnerable and admit you don’t know everything. It’s opening yourself to the judgment of others (most of which you’ll find is more friendly than you’d imagine) and it’s allowing yourself to let go and just be yourself. There is no race, there is no winner and no loser, there is no smarter than, and there is no better or worse.
The way I see it, there are only two things that really matter: The way things in your life are and the way you want these things to be.
Our marriages and families, our friendships, our careers, our connection to community and our personal development are ALL drastically effected by our attitudes, beliefs and behaviors- or the programming of of our brains, the most powerful computers on the planet.
Immediately, as infants, we begin to program these computers… As a matter of fact- by the time we are 18 years old- we will have programmed 95% of our attitudes, beliefs and behaviors. When you think about this deeper, it makes complete sense- We are all exposed to a vast array of stimuli for our very first time during these ages– which creates an emotional response- which forms a belief or perspective.
As an example- let’s talk about smoking. We all know that smoking is terrible for your health and causes issues in nearly every area of a persons life eventually. Now- cigarette manufacturers still exist however, and there’s a reason for that- The knowledge is not enough.
It is the BELIEF around smoking is that continues to feed the industry.
The belief is stronger than the knowledge. This is because the belief has been around longer— The belief that cigarettes are “cool” or “ease stress” or “help people relax”- is created long before knowledge of cancer, bad breath and odor.
For instance, if a person grows up with a parent that they love who also smokes— the person, as a child and when they are first exposed to the behavior, will start to make decisions about it.
Again- there’s a couple different ways this can go- Some people will look at this behavior as detrimental to health when they get older and make a firm decision to go in the opposite direction of their beloved parent and become a staunch non-smoker. This is not a problem for that person, we all know that they are now in at least a physically healthier state.
BUT, there are other people who have experienced a parent that they love who also has the habit of smoking and they will actually emulate this behavior. Out of love? Potentially- but let’s make it even more simple—
Imagine if, when that person was 2 or 3 years old and just starting to put together thoughts and ideas, they asked that same parent that they love so much a simple question like “Why do you smoke, mommy or daddy?”. The answer that’s given in that situation can be hugely impactful later in life because an off-handed answer like “I’m stressed out” can result in a decision by the child right then and there to believe that “Cigarettes ease stress”— If this idea is planted at 3 years old when there is very little knowledge, the negative side-effects aren’t seen or considered and this believe is given some very fertile ground in which to grow strong and tall.
It’s even possible that the very first time this child grows older and feels stress in their adult life- the first thing they will go for is cigarettes, even if they’ve never even smoked! And that’s because subconsciously this belief was programmed- “I love my mom or dad very much and they used cigarettes to ease their stress. Therefore, I can use them to ease my stress as well”.
When stress is introduced at age 12 or thereabouts, the brain searches for an answer (because that’s what a computer does with problems) and low and behold, the answer appears- “Cigarettes ease stress”. Never mind that this belief or perspective was created at 3 years old, the brain knows there is stress, is convinced that cigarettes can ease that tension and a craving is created. Just like that. A consequence of faulty programming installed after an earnest question was asked to a distracted, stressed out parent.
When we were given the gift of the most powerful computer on the planet and began programming it immediately by learning and making decisions about the world we were simultaneously exposed to a very limited amount of information. When a child asks a question, they are 100% present because they genuinely want to learn and gather information. It’s a thirst for knowledge- everything is so new and so exciting. We learn boundless amounts of information every day just by asking questions.
I read that parents are asked between 200 and 500 questions a day front he average 4 year old. When these questions are being asked of parent(s) who is also trying to manage their own lives in our ever-demanding modern society, it’s hardly a surprise that most parents aren’t actually 100% present while answering every one of those questions.
These unavoidable times are constantly occurring and they are exactly when faulty programming happens.
This article is in no way meant to be detrimental towards parents or the job we are doing raising children as a society- I personally believe that being a parent is the most difficult job there and comes with the highest level of responsibility. Collectively the beliefs, attitudes and behaviors of today’s youth will be mirrored in our nation’s future beliefs, attitudes and behaviors.
However, if we aren’t, in our adult lives, taking a step back, getting outside of ourselves and taking a look at the core values and beliefs that we programmed into our computers early on in our lives- then we are doing ourselves a disservice and I’m afraid we will be doomed to repeat the same behaviors, make the same mistakes, act the same way, experience the same emotions, and be the same people.
And if 70% of Americans are unhappy, then that 70% of American’s should be taking a long, hard look at this. Most of how we operate is programmed very early on, conditioned, and 100% reversible should we make the decision to change it.
One final thought, and one final thing to think about— I know this has been long—
Whether we are in the 30% of Americans that say they are happy or the 70% of Americans that say they are unhappy– we all are individually 100% responsible
Thank you so much for your time and I would appreciate any feedback you have